30th Wedding Anniversary

Today happens to be the day that my dad and my mom have lived together for 30 long years. I have seen them go through a lot of crap as I grew up. In a lot of ways I was the cause of a lot of the pain they went through.

My mom took most of the hit. She was the FLDG (First loss default guarantee) of the family. Everytime, we would fluctuate financially, she would be the first one to sacrifice. It pains me to see her shed a drop of tear than anything else. I could probably give up everything I have going, just to keep her happy for the rest of her life. She knows exactly when I am depressed and she can be a great alcohol detector - she knows it even when I have had one sip of beer. My dad ofcourse is super silent. He does not express his emotions much but his eyes are really expressive. He does not preach but sometimes generally passes a comment with a lot of meaning in it. He consumed alcohol like once a year and for my mom, he even gave that up. He went to a fairly elite club to go play tennis when we were younger with people wearing branded t-shirts, latest prince raquets and great tennis shoes. I have seen him use very simple sports shoes without a brand just because he could provide my sister and I with some additional nutrition and education.

They used to come to watch me play tennis tournaments in school. My dad would stand outside, shout and cheer as loudly as he could. Even today, when a marathon happens in Chennai, they still come out to cheer. They do not appreciate my lifestyle but never judge me based on it.

From my part, I have not contributed significantly to keep them happy. I spend very little time with them, when I am at home and mostly confine myself to my own room or am too lost in what I'll like to do in the future.

That's something I'll like to change about myself this year.